The Mop Closet

Well, I was gone for a few days there.  After all the excitement on Thanksgiving Day it was hard to sleep so I slipped out the service bay to catch a moon bath.  Getting naked on the lawn apparently upsets a lot of people.  Next thing I know, here comes Dr. Idiot with a syringe.  When I woke up I was locked in the mop closet!  At least, I think it was the mop closet.  I wasn't much worried about it.  I figured somebody would come looking for me.  There was nothing to do so I slept a lot.  I remember dreaming that Grover Norquist got caught eating a baby.  Anyway, when they let me out I sneaked a peek at the computer at the nurses station and tried to catch up on the news.  (Kind of tricky because of the plexiglass.)
First thing I saw was a story about the lady in this photo.  She was stuck in her house for 15 years!  Isn't that wild?  She must have broken the Guinness World Record!  It was nice of the President to go visit her.  She was probably dying to have a chat with anybody.  She wasn't in a mop closet but she was in her house for a LONG TIME.  A couple of days in the mop closet under heavy sedation isn't much to whine about. You just don't know what day it is until you get out, but 15 years stuck in her HOUSE?  There's only so many times you can play Solitaire before you get seriously bored.  Awhile back, I heard that the guys in prison get put in mop closets for so long it drives them crazy.  The President never goes to visit them though.  Probably too busy.  Anyway, since I just got out of the mop closet, the story got me thinking.  It made me woozy.  It was like the lady, the prisoners and I had one of those spiritual bonds.  After all, it doesn't really matter how big the mop closet is.  What matters is that you're in it.