Sunday, November 25, 2012

Happy T-Day!

We all had a lovely Thanksgiving here in the maximum security psychiatric facility.   I've never seen so much food flying through the air! A bunch of the fellows formed a human pyramid, you know, like cheerleaders? The top guy grabbed the ceiling light fixture by the mesh cover and oh boy!  He swung up there until his pants fell off!  He looked just like the angel on top of the Christmas tree!  The chef brought in a few of his junior chefs and they were so angry!  Maybe they should be patients here!  They brought in a ladder and tried to pull the guy down but that guy has a great grip.  So the ladder fell over, the chefs wound up with mashed potatoes and cranberry sauce all over their white chef clothes and we all applauded.  You can't get better than that on a Thanksgiving day! I hope you all had a great holiday. If you have a demented grandma in your family you probably get to have the flying food thing going on.

 If all you get is turkey baloney and the fixings you're doing better than a lot of other people.  You can always rub turkey baloney on your armpits and enjoy the smell for at least a day.  You might want to resist stealing those blow-up holiday decorations on you neighbor's lawn though.  One time I stole an inflatable Turkey and painted it to look like Sarah Palin, complete with the glasses, red jacket and frosted brown hair-do.  When the police came they laughed and laughed.  One of them actually had coffee and donuts squirt out his nose!  The folks I stole it from weren't happy, even though they were Republicans.  Some people just don't know a tribute when they see one.   I know darn well that Sarah Palin likes to kill turkeys because I saw her hanging out at the turkey slaughter house on TV awhile back.  If you see her tell her I said "High"!  She and I have so much in common!